[Vip-humor] You May Have a Serious Junk Problem If...

[Parker]

You May Have a Serious Junk Problem If...
- Hide when the doorbell rings.

- Wear your coat when you answer the door so your caller will think you were just leaving.

- Wait till after dark to pull the car into the garage.

- Live in fear that someone you respect may someday open one of your closets.

- Have to think about how to cross a room.

- Finally find the Christmas tree lights while hunting for the Easter baskets.

- Finally replace a badly worn or broken part -- then keep that broken part.

- Fear lifting the lid on some of the Tupperware in your refrigerator.

- Hide the tangled contents of a messy drawer by laying a couple of neatly folded things over the top.

- Drag a 22-cubic-foot chest freezer into the yard to keep the repairman from coming into the house.

- Have an unquenchable desire to paw through a moving neighbor's garbage before the trash truck comes.